Hopefully This Will Not Be My Dinner Today

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__My Afternoon Snack__ I've been enduring my appetite-loss due to the side-effect of my Parathyroid medicine so I just am not enjoying my food and that is everyday for nearly two years now. So it is just a life of a struggle for me and I do not know why I am still surviving all these although I am trying to keep myself as healthy as I can be. I am almost sure that my regular intake of vitamin C contributes to my longevity as any starting or brewing infection particularly in the lungs is prevented considering I have a wet lung issue all the time that makes it hard for me to breathe almost everyday. After dialysis I am not able to eat my food/meals anymore but I am trying but would rather skip than eat most of the time. Sometimes I would ask for a bread with margarine (not butter) so that at least I would not get hungry during nighttime. And yes my extra water issue in my body just prevents me from eating because any person would not be able to eat if there is a pressure inside their body especially with every bite is like you are drowning. I have that long-standing issue about it so it already affected my well-being in a negative way. Sometimes I would just like to really die because I am in misery now than when I was still in my other physical condition years ago as many factors today made my life almost unbearable. But still I am hopeful that things will get better although it is really hard for me to think about that and still I am persevering to make this short life of mine liveable and I still need prayers to make a difference in my life,

__My Phosphate Binder__ My diet is so strict but when I have this one it just liberalize my diet a bit because I get to eat forbidden foods but with a price because I have to double my tablet consumption of Renvela to assure me that I would not be able to absorb much of those Phosphorus that a forbidden food contains. I thank steem community for making this a possibility as I could afford this expensive medicine to improve my health and maintain it. Thank you God for my steemit friends, you know who you all are.
Originally posted here: https://steemit.com/health/@cryptopie/hopefully-this-will-not-be-my-dinner-today