Monday, May 6, 2019

Freedom - The Mental Battle is Half the Battle

https://ipfs.busy.org/ipfs/QmfG5uKiTniFRzkpfSZVpi8RCKh74gb4AehRWKQYfEZJpD
This is my entry into the [Freedom Challenge](https://steemit.com/freedomtribe/@freedomtribe/freedom-challenge-50-steem-in-prizes) by @freedomtribe. In this contest freedomtribe poses the question: > "What's the one thing you have lost - or would be afraid to lose - which would limit (or has already limited) your personal Freedom?" Poems, art, video, creative self-expression, images - show us what you've got!
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Loss of Health - Freedom to Eat Without Feeling Sick

The freedom that I have lost is the freedom to eat and not feel sick. It actually goes way beyond just feeling sick as at this point my condition, small intestinal bacterial overgrowth (SIBO), is destroying my quality of life on many levels. Brain fog and fatigue limit my capabilities for work, bloating and nausea limit my capabilities for living a healthy active life. Before this condition took hold, I had big plans to travel the world as a digital nomad, sustaining myself through a combination of an (FBA) business and freelance writing. That life of freedom now seems a distant dream, something I'll never achieve short of a miracle. I don't want to launch into a full-on explanation of my condition and it's debilitating effects as I've already detailed this in three recent posts. Check em out below if you would like. [My SIBO Story (part 1) - What is SIBO & How it has Effected Me](https://steemit.com/health/@raj808/my-sibo-story-part-1-what-is-sibo-and-how-it-has-effected-me) [My SIBO Story (part 2) - The Elemental (Mental) Diet - 3 Weeks Without Food](https://steemit.com/dtube/@raj808/of2sor97) [My SIBO Story (part 3) - After The Elemental Diet - Plans for Natural Healing](https://steemit.com/health/@raj808/my-sibo-story-part-3-after-the-elemental-mental-diet-plans-for-natural-healing) In this post, I'd like to address the mental battle with this loss of freedom and how I'm slowly flipping the negatives to positives, while finding a path to healing.

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Photo by v2osk on Unsplash

The Mental Battle is Half the Battle

Freedom can be a state of mind! So much of what we lack in our lives is made up from the constant questions, expectations, bemoaning and critical appraisal of our egoic-self. What do I mean by the term egoic-self? That voice inside that never stops judging while equating everything based on future plans and past failures. Finding some freedom from the busy mind is essential when trying to heal a complicated condition like SIBO as there are many physical, unchangeable circumstances that feed that critical voice inside. It's been my experience that the worry that accompanies the constant battle of eating when it causes you bloating and pain is as damaging as the physical symptoms of the condition itself. At least,if you let it! > Freedom can be limited in so many ways. But for many, the mind can be a prison of fear we make ourselves; fixation on future endeavor, or past failure can create this prison.
It's ironic really, that we are often the architect of our own illusions and can also be of our freedom if we can just relinquish control of the little me chattering inside.
A comment response from me to @bewithbreath in their [recent post](https://steemit.com/freedomtribe/@bewithbreath/thoughts-on-freedom-challenge-by-freedomtribe-what-s-the-one-thing-you-have-lost-or-would-be-afraid-to-lose-which-would-limit-or) for this competition.
Fear can be a major cross to bear. Whether it be fear of future failure, fear of death or fear of pain. All of these things seem to be parts of the human condition but it's the connection with self (or ego) that causes the suffering. Pain is pain, its true, it is perfectly natural and essential to have a mental, reaction to it. But with good practice and diligence the constant suffering can be avoided as the mind stops perpetuating that fear through assessing if/when it is ever going to stop. The identification with fear is the cause of prolonged suffering... not the brain/bodily fear reaction at its fundamental level. I've found if you can observe and let go of fear - not something I can't always achieve - some relief from the psychological suffering is found.

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Photo by [Julien Millet](https://unsplash.com/photos/HYBOqyse6EU) on Unsplash, poem written by me, © Rowan Joyce. The trick is letting go of *the fear rippling beneath the crust, until the flow settles and magma cools to dust.*
https://ipfs.busy.org/ipfs/Qmbg5YHqGFzceu2LBQfGXvjQbyRDDbrKbs4xwc7t96toRc Photo by Mariana Medvedeva on Unsplash
Have I achieved this?

Well, it's not easy. The mind has been training itself to constantly assess, evaluate, judge and critique since an early age. The level that we all do this is influenced by family, upbringing etc, but it's also imprinted on us from societal conditioning. This is why I believe it is key to retrain the mind to be still, especially for those who suffer chronic conditions. In that stillness resides relief from the ego's interpretation of everything and the suffering that can cause.
One way I've achieve this is through mindful eating. As eating is so intrinsically bound up with the physical symptoms I have to endure, it's the first logical step to removing a portion of the fear that goes with each portion of food. Also, the exercise of thoroughly chewing and appreciating the taste of the food is essential for reestablishing the gut brain connection. Scientists have proven that the action of properly chewing and focusing on food stimulates the [release of bile and other digestive enzymes.](https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/mindful-eating) This is a added bonus! My main concern in this practice is simply to become still during eating. To try and elevate some of the cramping in my small intestine and find freedom from the underlying fear of eating that has built up over the last four years. So far it is working to remove an element of the overall SIBO experience as I find myself obsessing over what symptoms may flare up a lot less. 🙂
This practice has brought me a measure of freedom from the (mental) suffering that comes with this condition and has taught me a life lesson. That the level of freedom individuals have in most situations is completely bound to two factors; mental and physical. The physical often can't be changed, but the mental is completely in our hands. In a wider context, if humanity as a whole could learn to separate their emotions from their psychology and live in a way less driven by ego, there would be a whole lot more freedom in the world. As well as a lot less suffering!

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Photo by Mariana Medvedeva on Unsplash ___ ___

All images are creative commons, linked to source below pics. Quote pictures were made by me using [GIMP open source photo editing software](https://www.gimp.org/). If you have enjoyed this post, you can check out similar work on my homepage [@raj808](https://steemit.com/@raj808). Thank you.

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Originally posted here: https://steemit.com/freedomtribe/@raj808/freedom-the-mental-battle-is-half-the-battle

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